This is part two of my 2011 – which was the rather hefty part of the year. part one here
It is still May of 2011. To re-cap, my work in Special Ed had been unbearable. Although I worked at an excellent school, I decided that after my trip to California for my brother’s college graudation, I would work the last six weeks of the school year – just enough to save money, then quit the job.
But then, while in California, I received a shocking call from my agency, basically stating that, for reasons unrelated to me, I no longer have a case to work with. My plan to work for at least six more weeks completely caved in! It’s as though, at the moment I told God that I’d surrender the job, He made a quicker way out for me.
I was stunned, but so suddenly reminded about how different the effectiveness of our prayers can be when we pray in agreement with God’s will for our lives. Alleluia.
It was a mere 10-day trip to California, but I returned to no job, not even a goodbye to the students and faculty I worked with (thanks to a strict policy), not even attending the farewell party they prepared for me (they knew I planned on leaving), not even showing my student the photo with Dora I made myself take… not even time to stock up on my savings account.
Not to mention – all while this was happening, I faced so many struggles – spiritually, relationally, and physically. I was spent.
I hold to the truth that He did not say “the sword shall not come,” but He said, “you will be spared.” He said there will be troubles, but He also said, “I have overcome.”
- May 10, 2011
I need a high vision for the reason I get into the Word.
And I realized: I want to be restored, set free, delivered;
I want to be released from the pain and wounds-
I want to be devoted, disciplined – more than duty.
I want to be refreshed, renewed… I cannot be who I am now.
“One sin persisted is fatal to the soul” – Charles Finney
I want to be at war against anything that hinders love.
“Hallelujah! There’s an appointed end to suffering!” – Cory Asbury
“What God’s truth demands, His grace will provide.” – Francis Frangipane- May 13, 2011
Then the most beautiful event of this year happened – my sister gave birth to a beautiful GIRL! It was surely a miracle, because the ultrasounds had told her she had a BOY. In fact, the two baby showers she had were laden with BLUE clothes! Little sweetness didn’t have a name for a while. Her story is her own to tell; her story is God’s. And she has the most beautiful name. Her middle name is Grace, which, though common, is absolutely right and full. In fact, the morning she was born, I had drawn this:
True- despite the weight of my struggles, I had so many family reasons to celebrate, enough to motivate my pursuit of finding the will of God.
“Now My heart is troubled, and what shall I say? ‘Father, save Me in this hour’? No, it was for this very reason I came to this hour. Father, glorify Your name!”
- John 12.27-28. May 24, 2011
I decided to trust. And yet again, when my heart agreed with the heart of God, two days later, on the same day, THREE job opportunities opened up for me. I began wondering about all these options! Which led me to write this.
I told God that I trust Him- and now I had to show Him that I trust Him, with everything.
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